Revival Sermons

The Family => Parenting Teens => Topic started by: Richard OFfill on August 02, 2009, 03:00:59 PM

Title: Funny Hair Styles
Post by: Richard OFfill on August 02, 2009, 03:00:59 PM
To what extend do you think a teen can do what they want? They seem to decide how they are going to do their hair and the clothes they want to wear. I don't remember having much trouble with our four children in this respect but these days they may want to die their hair green on one side and red on the other. They often treat their rooms as off-limits to the rest of the world. Is there anybody out their with any suggestions?
Title: Re: Funny Hair Styles
Post by: newbie on August 02, 2009, 03:31:00 PM
we can't know their heart motives but we all struggle in different avenues of temptation...  for instance:  a hair style like some I have seen would not be a temptation for me but then on the other hand, a late snack would be tempting for me and not for them... 

many youth are looking for distinction and they do not want to be lost in the crowd or treated as invisible.....  on the other hand, those that have all the attention, do not want it and want instead to be invisible....  it is a catch 22  :-)
Title: Re: Funny Hair Styles
Post by: guibox on August 02, 2009, 06:01:02 PM
Frankly, kids will go through their 'rebellious' stages when it comes to their appearance. However, I think this can be approached from a strictly non-religious angle to appeal to what little common sense teenagers have.

If you've ever watched TLC's "What Not to Wear" it is amazing how much the normal world says, 'If you go out looking like THAT you will have:
1) low self esteem
2) lack of job opportunities
3) bad first impressions from others
4) low chances of letting people see the real you

and many, many more.

People seem to think that they 'are being individuals' by dressing strange or shabby. They claim they don't want to look good because they will 'lose who they think they are'. The bottom line is that they want to dress the way they want people to really see them. Many kids (and adults) really don't know HOW to dress and when they do dress good and ready for success, their whole attitude changes!

It's a great show to watch! You learn alot about how how you dress determines how you feel and how people really look at you.
Title: Re: Funny Hair Styles
Post by: Deborah Risinger on August 04, 2009, 06:08:45 AM
This can be nothing more than a balancing act...how we approach kids can make or break the issue.

I have made some terrible mistakes "in this arena..regretfully so."

However... "as you behold you become."  I do believe this to be true.

 My son and I had made a "contract" between us.."I won't embarrass you and you don't embarrass me."  We wrote it out and both agreed to it.  It worked for us........

 :-) :-) :-)
Deborah
Title: Re: Funny Hair Styles
Post by: Larry Lyons on August 04, 2009, 09:47:19 AM
This can be nothing more than a balancing act...how we approach kids can make or break the issue.

I have made some terrible mistakes "in this arena..regretfully so."

However... "as you behold you become."  I do believe this to be true.

 My son and I had made a "contract" between us.."I won't embarrass you and you don't embarrass me."  We wrote it out and both agreed to it.  It worked for us........

 :-) :-) :-)
Deborah
Deborah, that contract is the best I've heard. It really gets to the heart of the matter. It can have deeper meaning than it might appear on the surface. It occurs to me that a contract like that will make it easier for a young person to understand that we also don't want to "embarrass" God. It makes me think of the counsel of the "True Witness" in Rev. 3:14-22, the message to the Laodiceans, and the "shame of thy nakedness" passage.
Title: Re: Funny Hair Styles
Post by: Deborah Risinger on August 04, 2009, 12:55:15 PM
For my son it was more practical than that...hhhe eheeeee....he knew if he pushed my buttons I'd walk through the school and well...............let your imagination go wild...hheheeheeee....who knows, I might show up wearing curlers in my hair. :-D :-D :-D

My son is quit wise to not tempt "mother-nature!"

God Help Us All as we deal with our kids !!!!
Deborah
Title: Re: Funny Hair Styles
Post by: newbie on August 04, 2009, 02:46:14 PM
This can be nothing more than a balancing act...how we approach kids can make or break the issue.

I have made some terrible mistakes "in this arena..regretfully so."

However... "as you behold you become."  I do believe this to be true.

 My son and I had made a "contract" between us.."I won't embarrass you and you don't embarrass me."  We wrote it out and both agreed to it.  It worked for us........

 :-) :-) :-)
Deborah

nice job   :-)
Title: Re: Funny Hair Styles
Post by: Richard OFfill on August 04, 2009, 07:22:40 PM
Perhaps I mentioned this in another post but it seems to me that if we are going to be effective in our negative instruction we should be quick to affirm and appreciate the young people. It seems that, in my case at least, I don't think I appreciated them enough and expressed it to them.
Title: Re: Funny Hair Styles
Post by: newbie on August 04, 2009, 08:52:18 PM
Perhaps I mentioned this in another post but it seems to me that if we are going to be effective in our negative instruction we should be quick to affirm and appreciate the young people. It seems that, in my case at least, I don't think I appreciated them enough and expressed it to them.
each one is different and one size does not fit all when it comes to young people...  some astute discernment is needed to know when one needs calm assertive direction or encouragement   :-)
Title: Re: Funny Hair Styles
Post by: lily-of-the-field on October 03, 2009, 01:28:53 PM
Within reason, a teenager ought to have a little say in how in she or he wears her/his hair.  But they need to understand that how they wear their hair will impact on the impression they make to the world.  The Christian teenager ought not to desire strange hair colors or the shock factor, and this is probably where I would draw the line.  I personally would not force my teenager to wear a hairstyle that make them feel ugly or uncomfortable.  Teenagers need to feel like they have some say over their appearance.  Let them have some choice but the parent has the final say over the selection of choices ; )